Category: Health and Wellness
Wonder if someone with a background in psychology could answer a question. I have a friend who's been in therapy with the same psychologist for four years and, at least to me, this seems highly unusual because I would have thought that if they couldn't be helped by one psychologist after a while they would be referred to someone else. Why would a psychologist keep seeing the same patient for four years with minimal, if any, improvement? Just seems a bit unusual to me.
I know a woman who went to the same therapist for going on 19 years. It did sort of pay off in the end. The therapist watched as the woman slowly recovered, and eventually asked the woman if she was ready to stop the therapy. The woman agreed that it was time. Something like this is hard to say, since I think it has to be taken on a case by case basis, though I get exactly what you mean. I don't think people in abusive situations can all recover at the same rate. It might take months or even years for the patient to finally feel comfortable enough to really get at the root of the problems, but until they do, the therapist can't really do much.
I know someone who see's one currently, well a therapist rather than a psychologist. Not much of a difference, I don't think anyways. Well anyways, they work and talk through her problems which is kind of what they're there for. So while I see what you mean, I don't see what you mean. And I do agree with you above, sir Anthony. :)
All right. I can understand how it might seem unusual, but there is no estimated time for a person to recover. I don't even know that someone can fully recover, rather yet, learn to live and deal with the problems. It may take months, years or even a person's lifetime. And the Process may be challinging and may lead to other problems that the person needs help handleing. I suppose that if the psychologist/therapist is of no help the patient must seek elsewhere, but if otherwise, what do years matter? Both the patient and psychologist/therapist determen when the patient is ready to live with and handle the problems on their own.
Exactly. Many years of abuse isn't going to be dealt with by a single month of counseling, most likely.
to add to what has been said, it's damn near impossible for outsiders to know if the therapy is helping those in it, unless we've talked to them ourselves.
plus, as was said, abuse isn't something to be taken lightly, and honestly, I'd argue that no one can ever fully recover from that sort of thing.
There is a difference between psychology and counselling. Not all people who receive degrees in psychology are counsellors, nor do you have to receive a degree in psychology to be a counsellor. It depends on two things. 1, the type of counselling the person receives, and 2, the person themselves. Things that can throw off counselling is the fact that people know they are in counselling, so they act the way they think they should, which can create a bias in the counsellor. They may think that the client is ok because he/she behaves the way they should in front of the counsellor. So in reality there is no set time in how long or short counselling is, no matter what the type of counselling or circumstance.
I don't think there can be a concrete answer to this question. Every person is different, every situation is different. For that matter, no two counselor/client relationships are alike, either. People progress at their own speed and in their own time. Often people have issues and behavior patterns that they've been dealing with for years, and sometimes that can take years to change. and if someone is living with a serious and persistent mental illness, long-term therapy may be needed.
That's correct, many years of abuse and other stuff isn't going to be dealt with be a single year of counseling or a single session even. It takes a lot and a lot of reputation. Especially, depending upon the issue or issues at hand.
I wonder if some of it isn't the personality of the one in counseling. I've had situational depressions in the past, one of which resulted in my being on an antidepresant for about two or three months. Actually, truth to tell, I probably was in a situational depression for several years until either circumstances changed for me on their own, or I found the courage to change them myself. I wasn't in counseling the majority of that time because I learned through counseling that simply talking about my problems wasn't enough. I knew what my problems were. I knew, in some ideal fashion, how to solve them. And when they did change or I found the courage to change them, I found I ended up being a lot happier. Not worry-free, and there are some things I'm still dealing with, but I figure that's life. But that's a formula that worked for me; it may not work for everyone else.
Johndy, your post shows one of the biggest misconceptions about counseling that exists: that all it is is talking about your problems. I disagree. Well, put it this way: I think counseling should be more than just talking. You're right in one thing: if all a counselor has a person do is talk, that's not going to go anywhere fast. Talking is a big part, but if it's good counseling, with the aim of helping the client move forward, the counselor will help that client find tools and coping skills to use on their own in the future. That way the client becomes more able to handle their own issues, or to keep them from getting as bad as they might have in the past. Good counseling will involve the client having to face things about themselves and/or others they may not want to, or hearing things they may not like hearing, etc. Good counseling, in my opinion pushes the client, and it's not easy. It can be downright difficult, and sometimes scary. So if your idea of counseling is just having someone sit there while you talk, then that's pretty poor counseling indeed.
Well, then most counselors I've hard of and heard my friends speak of must be pretty downright bad...I thought that's what they were there for...to sit there and help you through your problems and to listen to you and guide you through? For you to put your all on the table in front of so to speak, if you get what I am saying. Or maybe I am thinking of a therapist more or less? Friend of mine who sees BOTH a counselor and a Therapist tells me I get them mixed up a lot, but wow, big eye opener to the poster above me...wow...and johnboy, I like your post and see nothing wrong with it.
And as I said, what didn't work for me may work for someone else. The counseling I got from a professional most of the time just involved passive listening and parroting back, in different words, what I'd already said. When I either took steps to change things or talked to a friend about what was going on, I honestly got more out of those things than I ever got out of counseling. Maybe my problems weren't ultimately that bad?
That is just one type of counselling, though. There isn't a style that fits every situation. There is no single way that works for every client and makes them comfortable. This is why counselling can be hit or miss because there are so many options and possibilities with clients that you could end up counselling.
Johndy, I like that word you used, "situational depression." I really hate it when your average nong nong tries to tell you it doesn't depend en circumstances.
I just got out of a lot of debt, I'm no longer the only income in the household, and, latest of all, I'm a free man again. I'm getting a part of myself back that's been coroding for years. It'll take me some time, but it'll come, I already feel it a lot.
I think back to a year ago, and I wonder how I even survived with all that inside!
I had no energy to listen to The Chick when she needed it, and I wanted to be able to. All sorts of things like that.
It's like finances: Not all financial problems can be solved by a financial planner. Not all emotional problems can be solved by a shrink I think. Some are just circumstances and you just gotta be your own man and find a way to get the f out!
Alicia you're right about the shrink thing, they don't always talk to you or have you fill in the blank with sentences or have you recount things, as challenging as all that stuff is. This guy I went to this past spring for something entirely different, something The Cick thought I should go see him for, he had me do a tapping thing they call bilateral stimulation. He was honest about the fact some things are a physical response from the primitive part of your brain, I think the word is amigdula but one of you all can correct me if I'm wrong. And that stuff really worked. It apparently only works on anxiety related to a particular event, things that push your buttons or what some people on the Internet call "triggers".
Anyway to the original poster, if the person thinks it's useful it's probably doing something for them. Them types of places are no cakewalk though.
Ryan is right. There are different counseling theories and styles out there. The kind where the counselor just sits and passively listens and parrots your words back is called client-centered, if I'm remembering correctly. Which I've always thought of that as a weird term, because I'd say all counseling should be centered on the client. Yes, Steelersfan, the counselor is there to help you work through your problems. They just have different ways of doing that. Which is why, when seeking a counselor, it's impoertant to learn what their style is, and if that style works with what you need. For me personally, I go for the cognitive behavioral approach when looking for someone, because that's what's most helpful to me.
Of all the posts I have just read, Sigmund you make the best point. Short and sweet and TO THE POINT!!! I specifically precisely agree.
I went to the same therapist from 2004 to early last year. Started going to acupuncture after that. It's much more relaxing.
well good points have been made here and I agree each person is different and so the counselling or therapy needed is depending on the person's circumstances and I don't really think there is a time frame of how long you should be in counselling but it is up to you and the professional your seeing to decide whether or not it is time to stop therapy but if it isn't helping your friend they might need to seek some one new.
Now I had counselling but then I was referred onto a psychologist because the counsellor didn't have the exact expertise needed and so it was best to see some one higher up which was surely needed which in the long run helped, smiles.